A few years ago when I was employed; I was speaking with a young woman who was newly married. I’ve known her for a good while. She’s gorgeous outwardly and inwardly her character reflects her outward beauty. I began to notice that every now and then she would show up with injuries. One day I saw her moving in a manner that looked serious; I asked her what was wrong. She informed me that she had cracked ribs and that it was due to her opening up a roll of those frozen dough pastries that you bake in the oven. You know the kind that you smack against something so that the tube pops open. Instantly I knew that the story was goofy but I focused more on her being at work injured than I did with that crazy story she handed me. Later that day the Holy Spirit had informed me that she is the victim of spousal abuse. I began to realize that all types of women are victims of abuse. Strong minded/willed; weak minded/willed; mature or immature; educated or illiterate; young; middle age or seasoned. She like me is intelligent and strong minded yet she became the victim of abuse. It’s an embarrassment to the victim. The victim is abused by another and then abuses themselves by lying about the abuse. It’s an ongoing evil process that seems to never end. Throughout the Bible you will find abuse from Genesis to Revelation. It’s nothing new and because we are victims of this offense we must come to a place of realization that we are not alone. Others have gone through this torture as well. Do you realize that there is one in every home that is the victim of abuse? You yourself know at least one person who is either abused or is an abuser; yet you are unaware. If we really look with our eyes and listen we will recognize the abuser and the victim.
The word abuse is found in the Bible under such related words as forgiveness; drugs; struggles; family; hope and suffering.
Because I’m an abuse survivor and former abuser; I know that abuse comes from a very dark place and is a curse that is passed on from generation to generation. As well as a characteristic that is transferred to another whom has been the victim of abuse.
So how do we rid ourselves of abuse? Well it’s not easy and it requires faith on our part. It’s often times a characteristic that can be overcome by sheer will power; we must surrender ourselves over to GOD and allow HIM to deliver us from this torture that holds us prisoner to ourselves and others.
1. We must ask GOD to forgive us then forgive ourselves.
2. We must repent from actively practicing abuse to ourselves and others. Abuse begins in our thoughts then our hearts then in action. Speak from your mouth to GOD what abusive thoughts you are having. Tell someone that you sincerely trust that you are having these thoughts that you know will not judge you.
3. Turn to the Word of GOD and speak from your mouth what GOD’s Word is saying. This will cause the enemy to flee from you when you bring his motives into the light. You can’t win this battle with just thoughts.
4. Ask your victims to forgive you. They do not have to forgive you though it will be wonderful. Understand that the decision to forgive you is their choice. Your asking for forgiveness will release you. Their forgiving you will release them.
5. Don’t allow the enemy to keep taunting you about your past. Let him know about his past and future. He has no hope; you do.
6. Once you know that abuse is no longer a temptation for you do what you can to help those who want to be free from abuse or and those who have been abused. You know for yourself that those who abuse have been abused.
7. Share with others how you had been abused and what the results were. People can relate to those they know have had the same experience as themselves.
Every type of abuse that you have or have not experienced is found in the definition of just those two words I provided below.
Scripture reference & definition:
Sexual abuse; Judges 19:25
Suicide; 1 Samuel 31:4; 1 Chronicles 10:4
Assault; Acts 14:5
Manipulation; 1 Corinthians 9:18
Abuse: To use wrongly or improperly; misuse one’s authority. To treat in a harmful, injurious, or offensive way. To speak insultingly, harshly, and unjustly to or about; revile; malign.
Manipulate: To manage or influence skillfully, especially in an unfair manner.