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Another Testimony of Shawn D. Briscoe, Eld.
I have been thinking about publicizing this particular testimony for one particular reason only that I will not disclose only because I personally am choosing not to do so. However, I am willing to share with you why I have been absent and why I have not been sharing blogs of encouragement, information, and inspiration as frequently as I had been doing.
Normally, I just pull out some notes that I had taken from many years ago which I had applied to my life. But today, I need help gathering some of those notes up so that I can share them with you. I use my old notes. After all, I cannot use any of my newer notes because I am learning to utilize those things that I am being reminded of or learning myself. Once, those things have become a part of my life, I hope to share those with you because they will become older notes as well.
Today, this is to inform you that I have been having some health issues and recently I have had a stint in the hospital from complications of, yet another stroke followed by low-grade seizures. I was left with the inability to speak or use my entire left side.
Now, I want you to see the humor in this with me if you please. I have been arrested within my body, I am unable to communicate or move the entire side of my body, and these highly educated, skilled, and trained professionals known as physicians and nurses kept asking me a series of questions knowing that I could not speak. They also kept asking me to move the side of my body that I could not move. You would have thought that at least one of those highly educated individuals would have said, “we need to provide her with a pencil/pen and paper to write so she can answer our questions”. But no, that never occurred to one of those dear souls.
Several of them would lift my left arm and leg only to watch it drop like a stone. Then came the medical vampires who drew my blood and inserted the catheter in each arm for the IV and continuation of taking my blood. I was given a medication called TPA which is a superior blood thinner and clot buster. And then taken to have one of many Cat Scans.
Then I heard the physicians explain to my beloved daughter that I may never speak or walk again but if I did it would be after I have lived in a nursing/rehab facility for several months. I began to find my will to buck against this.
I can recall with each evil report my will to rebuke what was being said grew stronger and stronger. I could hear within my heart and mind me crying out to GOD to deliver me from this. While laying there my left hand began to move in my beloved daughter’s hand and eventually, I could lift my left arm without assistance. I still am not able to use my voice, but I knew that this was going to return shortly. And as more time elapsed, I was able to moan and from tiny to small sounds came words. They were incoherent by the listener much like when a baby is learning to use his/her words. With each straining of using my voice, I became exhausted, but I was determined to break free from my own body. And I knew with GOD’s help this accomplishment was going to manifest itself.
Again, I was whisked away for another Cat Scan and after I came out from that machine, I began to speak intelligently to my physician. She was surprised and said to me, “It was that TPA we administered. I hoped that results would be seen from it, but I never expected it to work quite that quickly”. This dear lost soul placed all her trust in science, and I chose to place all my trust in JESUS. And it was and is JESUS that I thanked.
I just knew that as they had taken me back to my room in the Emergency department that after a while longer that I would be able to go home. But that was not the case, my beloved daughter and I were told that I would have to spend at least twenty-four hours in the Surgical Intensive Care Unit [SICU] and then forty-eight hours on the Stroke Ward, and then from there, I would be discharged to a nursing/rehab facility. I vocally said “NO” I want to go home. But I relented after I understood why I had to go to the SICU and it was based on the knowledge of them giving me the medication TPA, patients must be closely monitored after being given this. But I said “okay, but after that, I am going home”.
So, off I go to SICU accompanied by the physicians who were helping me in the Emergency Room/department. I am made as comfortable as a person can be by their standards. My thoughts are still confused from the stroke because it is trying to reboot itself. I am finding it difficult to recall to memory the Word of GOD, but I can recall the name of JESUS and for me, that was enough. Because I know that at the name of JESUS everything must bow. And the complications of this stroke were going to bow down before the name of JESUS as long as I was able to think of HIS name within my heart and mind and speak HIS name. We were told that in SICU visitation was not allowed and though I did not like this, I said within myself “that is okay, I will only be here for one day”. My beloved daughter was allowed to bring to me my cellular phone so that communication would be established with my beloved children, parents, and mate.
But I was shook when I found out that I was not able to communicate using my mobile phone because though my beloved daughter had plugged the chargers of my mobile phone and tablet into the electrical socket, they were both drained of battery power. But my beloved daughter called the nurses station on the SICU ward, and they provided me with a telephone, and my beloved daughter and I began to communicate. Later, the following day, the day that I was to be transferred up to the Stroke Ward a medical technician came in to give to me an EKG and when he plugged in his equipment and it worked swimmingly well, I asked if he would relocate my charges in the hope that this would provide power to my mobile devices. And after five minutes I began to see power restored to them. So, I called my beloved daughter and explained to her why I could not use my mobile devices. Then I said that I wanted to call my parents so that they could hear my voice and it would ease their minds. Now, it is here that I will bless the name of JESUS for a praying Mother. I will not say that my current situation at the time did not worry her because she is a mother with a mother’s heart as I am concerning my beloved children. And though when we walk by faith and not by sight and as a Mother, we do not want to see our baby/babies in a situation that we have no control to pull them out from. It is during these times when we as mothers cannot use our own willpower to physically be of help. So our only alternative is to run to the throne of GOD and pray for our baby/babies regardless of their age. And this is what I know with assurance my mother did, she remained in our FATHER’s face until she received a release.
My beloved daughter had to remind me how to locate my contacts on my mobile devices because I could not at that time recall how to do so. And after speaking with my parents, I could physically hear without them doing so, the sigh of relief in their hearts and how they were beginning to calm down because they did not know anything and because they were being told that they were not allowed to visit. Despite the fact that I did not want to see anyone or better yet, I did not want anyone to see me in my current situation. I preferred for them to see the victory over what looked to be defeat.
Well, I have now been in the SICU for twenty-four hours and I am ready to go up to the Stroke Ward. I questioned my being transferred and was told that I had to remain there a full twenty-four hours. Which meant the clock began the moment I was placed into the SICU room, not the moment I came into the hospital. And, because I did not know what that time was, I had to ask. And an answer was provided. Then later, I was informed that I had to have another Cat Scan and that afterward, I would be going up to the Stroke floor. Okay, now that had been done and I have been returned to the SICU room, I impatiently waited to get out of SICU and onto the Stroke ward. Only, to be told that the physicians want me to remain until after I have had a Medical Resonance Imaging [MRI]. This occurred forty-eight hours after my stay in SICU and then I was returned yet again to this location. All in all, after I became a nag about getting out of there my stay in SICU was a total of seventy-four hours. My nagging was birthed out of my wanting to get out of there and home so that I can be surrounded by my Bibles to read and study GOD’s Word and to regain strength. Unfortunately, the hospital that I had my miserable stay in does not provide Internet but Intranet and this means that limited access to the outside world was being provided. I was able to read my electronic Bible but only one translation of that, though I was grateful for that and did study I knew that I could have gone deeper had I been home.
During my long stay in the hospital, I began each morning in the Word of GOD reading and studying until the nurses would come into the room to take my vitals, and then soon following came the dietician helpers who delivered the meals. And, then my daily dose of watching television, speaking on the phone with my parents, my beloved daughter, my one and only biological sister, and my loving partner in life. You know, I cannot recall at any time in my life how I wanted to be out of a location as desperately as I wanted to be out of there and I have spent some time in horrible places.
This is what I had been shown during my stay in the hospital. Without GOD’s Word, I am a horrible person. I am living on fumes of love because I was consumed by what I wanted which was to go home. I did not see the medical staff as needing JESUS and that HE died for them. All I could see were the faults of some and the great care of others. As I looked around, I could only see the lack of beauty versus being on the outside to view the creativity of GOD’s landscape and speaking with passer-byers as I do when I am out and about. I heard myself making complaints regarding the care and environment more than praising JESUS. Once, this revelation knowledge was made visibly clear to me, I thanked GOD yet again for HIS Word and the time that I got to spend with HIM though it was not in the manner in which I would prefer. I kept thanking HIM for HIS deliverance of what I was able to do in the now and for what I will be able to do in the future. I had to work overtime to speak words of encouragement when speaking on the phone to my loved ones and not snap at most of the nurses because they kept coming in to take my vitals. I tell you, long gone are the days when a person had to be admitted into the hospital for medical care and rest. Now, all you get is medical care and no rest.
Well, today, I am home and again I thank GOD for being surrounded by my various translations of the Bible, my television so that I can pull up my pastors and view the worship services, the ability to pull up also on YouTube various gospel artists who sing praise and worship that propel me into studying and going before the throne of my FATHER and Savior. And the hearing of the Holy Spirit’s direction. Now, since I have been home, I have been able to do what the physicians said I would not be able to do anytime soon and that is walk. I am incredibly slow but none the less I am walking in the name of JESUS. The GOD that I serve is the Everlasting GOD whose words are true. My hope is not in doctors or medicine both of which I thank GOD for, but this is not where I place my trust nor is this the final say so. GOD has the final say over my life and it is HIS report that I believe in and no other.
FATHER, I thank YOU that you have created me to be a mental fighter and what we as humans call hard-headed and self-willed/stubborn. It is because of my hard-headedness and will that I ignored the report of the human physicians and focused my will on YOUR promises and the fact that I know YOU to be The HEALER and Great PHYSICIAN. And it is YOU that I relied and rely on. FATHER, keep me ever close to YOUR Word because I do not like my human natural self. There is no good in flesh and fleshy tendencies at all. I thank YOU for showing me that I still require YOU above all. FATHER, I pray that everyone that has asked me to pray for them who are not aware of my current situation because they do not need to know that they recover from what is attacking their health suddenly. If anyone who has asked me to pray for them is not a child of YOURs, I ask that they hear and listen to the voice of the Holy Spirit calling them towards JESUS and begin to believe by faith in all that JESUS is and has done on their behalf so that they can truly live in and for HIM. I choose not to tell in detail FATHER all that I am going through because I am YOUR servant, and I am their servant. I am here to be a help to them as YOU provide me with YOUR help. In the name of JESUS, I place all my trust in YOU today, and if I have a tomorrow, again I will do the same in JESUS name. I want to see YOUR Glory on this wonderful day in all that I do for YOU. FATHER, thank YOU for my beloved parents, children, sister, and my life partner, my ministry, and my life in YOU.
Dear readers, it is not enough to know and quote John 3:16 you must believe this because this scripture is life-changing. Believe that GOD/FATHER gave to you JESUS as your gift from the very beginning. Who does not like getting gifts!? No one! When presented with a gift we all take them, so please take the Free Gift of JESUS because HE belongs to you alone, yes alone. We must learn to make JESUS personal though we know that JESUS belongs to each human. Confess daily that HE belongs to you, and you belong to HIM and desire to grow up in HIM. Walk-in HIS love for self and others. Walk-in forgiveness of self and others. Walk-in grace and mercy for self and others in the name of JESUS. Because HE thought that you were worth saving.