November 16, 2020
Rebuke, Rod, and Wisdom – Proverbs 29:15
We all need to be justly/rightly rebuked by our parents not abused. Many scriptures instruct parents to correct their child/children properly. When parents neglect their full responsibility in parenting then the outcome of the child is no one’s fault but yours. If a guardian is raising the child/children, then the responsibility of their outcome falls on you.
The use of open-handed spankings, the use of an instrument of punishment for correction such as a belt, paddle, or switch will give wisdom to never do what had been done again.
Naturally, foolishness is to be found bound up within children. But knowing this hopefully does not constitute the requirement to hall off and punch the kid. The first measure of discipline is to speak and reason with the child. If that does not work quickly enough for the parent then punish the child by taking something away that you know will hurt them such as a favorite toy or not being able to enjoy a festivity that he/she was looking forward to participating in. The last resort that we will want to do is to hit the child but hitting the child will not kill the kid. Sometimes hitting a child without being abusive is what it will take to get your (the parent or guardians) point across.
What we forget and should remember that children are born with a blank clean slate and we are the writers of what goes onto that slate. Never assume because the child is getting older that they should know something. Just as we took the time to teach them to hold an eating utensil and encouraged them to walk. The same patience must be applied throughout their growing up years.
No person enjoys being hit (I hope) so the instrument of discipline that a parent or guardian chooses to use be it an open slap to the buttocks or upper thigh; the use of a belt, paddle, or switch to the same area should be effective when we use this measure along with lovingkindness because you should not find enjoyment in having to use this measure of punishment on your child but sometimes it must be done. Also, use godly wisdom then you will find that you will not go wrong.
Parents or guardians who with lovingkindness and godly wisdom had to, unfortunately, use this to demonstrate that they are to be obeyed found that once the child becomes a teenager and adult that they genuinely appreciated having parents that loved them enough to steer them correctly. These children are far more proned to staying out of legal trouble and hopefully refrain from dabbling in alcohol, drugs, and smoking. Children need and want to be corrected properly with discipline and it demonstrates to them that we care and love them enough to do this rather than leaving them to their own devices.
But I personally will like to share some lessons that I either exhibited or did not exhibit that for the most part caused my children to be successful in my shortcomings of grooming them.
- Display a lifestyle that you will like your children to continue. Live the example do not just speak. Do as I say not as I do is ridiculous and has the opposite effect of what you may want for your children. {I hope I did this correctly}
- Always encourage your children, whatever they will like to be groom them to be that. Begin with buying the toy that fit that dream. If they change their minds to something else then buy what is required to fit that dream. Never say to them that they cannot be what they speak that they want to be. {I hope I did this correctly, I know that I did not buy the toys but I did say that they can accomplish that}
- Never oppress your children by not allowing them to be themselves. This may cause resentment as they are growing up. {I know that I messed up here because I jumped over the cliff about things that I did not speak with them about to gain an understanding about why} {The generation gap does exist}
- Do not be your children’s friend. This will come later once they become adults. Be what they need, a parent. {I did this}
- After GOD, put your children first. They need you. If they cannot rely on and trust in you to be there for them while they are growing up, they will find the wrong mentors out in the streets. Parents should always be their children’s hero/shero. {I hit and missed in this area}
- And stop saying that instructions do not come with children because they do. We find all the instructions needed in the Word of GOD from disciplining them to encouraging them, to what not to do as a parent. {I did not utilize these instructions properly}
- Stop screaming, yelling, and using profanity so much. {I failed BIG time here}
- Take the time to LISTEN to them speak {I failed miserably here}
As parents and guardians, we must learn to godly rebuke disobedience out of our children. Learn to justifiably and rightly apply the instrument of punishment as our final resort to get them to understand that we are to be obeyed. And, most of all use spiritual godly wisdom when dealing with children so that they will obtain spiritual godly wisdom.
AMFBeM (™)
Note to my children, if you are reading this article set me straight about my parenting you so that I will not believe what is or is not true. I am not perfect and all parents make mistakes that they do not see until after the child has become an adult. I am totally over the moon in LOVE with you. And as always my LOVE for you is unconditional and there has never been nor will there ever be anything that you do that can stop me from believing in you loving you more from day-to-day.